Oct 092015
 
5 Huge Revelations from the 'American Horror Story: Hotel' Premiere
FX

American Horror Story: Hotel premiered on Wednesday night, and while we still have more questions than answers, several vital details have emerged.

The internet is absolutely obsessing over Gabriel’s (Max Greenfield’sconical rape scene (the Schmidt is hitting the fan), but we’re over here wondering about the other bombs that were dropped.

For example, let’s talk about the fact that…

Mare Winningham is British (?!)

5 Huge Revelations from the 'American Horror Story: Hotel' Premiere
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Winningham’s character, presently best described as “the laundress” given that she’s thus far unnamed, is a British maid. She’s happy to tend to the horrific needs of the Cortez, and seems to pride herself on getting the blood out of sheets.

We know that she’ll be working closely with the hotel’s original owner, Mr. March (Evan Peters), so her role will be larger than that of past seasons. What we don’t know is when Mr. March is going to show up.

Way to keep us waiting, Peters — and hey, speaking of whom, does the laundress’s accent indicate that Mr. March will also be English? We really hope so. What is it about evil Brits that renders malice so much more poignant?

This season is going to be equal parts CSI and horror.

5 Huge Revelations from the 'American Horror Story: Hotel' Premiere
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Upon watching the show’s premiere, it’s immediately obvious why AHS creator Ryan Murphy has dubbed it the “darkest” season yet: a few blood-drinking quasi-vampires and ghostly individuals notwithstanding, the true terror lies in the various addictions of the show’s characters.

From sex and drugs to alcohol, video games, sugar, and even love, Hotel revolves around the way we feed our real-life demons.

Ghosts are scary, but legitimate afflictions that people we know IRL may just suffer from? Much scarier.

The little slytherins are blood-guzzlers like Gaga.

5 Huge Revelations from the 'American Horror Story: Hotel' Premiere
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Let’s just forget for a moment that Wes Bentley’s character, Detective John Lowe, has a missing son (that it turns out is not missing at all, as The Countess has stolen him and converted him into one of her albino atrocities). What’s really fascinating is that these children seem to have the same bloody diet as Gaga’s Elizabeth and her adult brood.

What’s up with that?

Donovan and Elizabeth might be more of a team than previously speculated.

5 Huge Revelations from the 'American Horror Story: Hotel' Premiere
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Not sure about you, but we’d assumed Elizabeth would be dragging her male subjects around on leashes (we’re looking at you, Liz Taylor) but it seems the two are less hierarchical than previously thought.

While it’s true that Elizabeth calls the shots and owns the Cortez, the way they took down that poor couple (who they met at a public screening of Nosferatu, irony much?) indicated an unexpectedly strong partnership and a seamless sort of companionship.

Bates is Bomer’s mother.

5 Huge Revelations from the 'American Horror Story: Hotel' Premiere
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Okay, this explains a lot, but…wat? It’s a twist we didn’t see coming.

Bates also played Jimmy’s (Peters’) mother in Freak Show and a mother in Coven, meaning that she’s been cast as such for every season.

Innnteresting…

P.S. We still miss Jessica Lange, but she’s kinda like…

5 Huge Revelations from the 'American Horror Story: Hotel' Premiere
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So, you know, we’ll get over it.

5 Huge Revelations from the 'American Horror Story: Hotel' Premiere
Source: Zimbio

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