Netflix’s Fuller House has earned itself a renewal.
The Full House reboot, filmed a full 20 years after its predecessor, has reunited us with many of our favorite Tanner, Gibbler, Katsopolis, and Gladstone families. We’ve also been introduced to the Fullers, D.J.’s kids, who make up the majority of the new plot line.
Love it or hate it, Fuller House is here to stay. But before we initiate the countdown to Season 2, we’ve got some questions in dire needs of answers.
1. WHO was D.J.’s husband, how exactly did he die, and why is there not one picture of him around the house?
Inquiring minds need to know: what the heck happened to Mr. Tommy Fuller? We know that he was a firefighter (who probably passed in the line of duty), but throughout the course of 13 episodes no further detail has been given.
2. Where did Kimmy Gibbler meet Fernando, and what happened to Duane?
We’re giving it up to Kimmy: utilizing some very NSFW methods, she reeled in a mega-hottie — all despite her goofie Gibbler tendencies. But still, we need answers. Where did they first meet? How did they hook it up? Is Fernando entirely out of the picture now that their re-marriage is [ostensibly] off? Does that leave room for her OG ex, Duane, to re-enter the picture? Only time will tell.
3. Where did Danny’s new wife, Teri, come from, and why does she seem so disconnected from the rest of the family?
Danny’s single status was a going theme throughout Full House’s eight seasons; the death of his wife, his busy schedule working and being a full-time dad, and the girls’ subsequent issues with the loss of their mom left him with no real chance at love for years.
Who is this Teri lady? Does she deserve our Danny? We deserve an explanation, damn it.
4. On the realest note, how did Steve get through medical school?
You know the one: goofy, silly, well-meaning Steve of mediocre intelligence. A podiatrist? There’s some trickery afoot.
5. It’s been 29 years. No hate, but are Joey and Mr. Woodchuck even serious yet?!
Wait, they’re not dating?
6. Is anyone ever gonna address Stephanie’s boobs?
Anyone other than Twitter, we mean.
Are we really meant to believe she grew into those suckers? And if we’re suspending belief that far, can someone please let us know?
7. Why are Nicky and Alex just now going to school?
The actors who played Nicky and Alex, Blake and Dylan Tuomy-Wilhoit, are now 25 years old. In the world of Fuller House, however, it’s been 29 years since we last caught up with the crew.
It’s absolutely no problem if they’re 30-somethings in college, but given that their current life plan is to run a taco truck after graduation, we’re really unclear on how the timeline works out. Did we miss a big chunk of their lives?
8. Has Steve seriously not moved on even a little bit since dating D.J. a full THREE DECADES prior?
Red flag, girl. Red flag.
9. If Michelle has a fashion empire in New York, why in the world would Danny even consider selling the house?
We get it, we get it, the Olsens weren’t in for the reboot. But it’s completely contradictory to the show’s “family first” tenet to suggest Michelle would let her dad sell her childhood home.
Second, it seems clear Danny doesn’t really need the money. Does he even understand how valuable San Francisco real estate is?
10. Seriously, where’s Derek Boyd?
We need a little Derek in our modern lives.